Sigh!

But!

How could I let go a collection of years!

Ideas, dreams, opinions, and oh! tears

Carefully filled with countless thoughts;

a mind, that has never known to stop..

Sinking deep in a murky bottomless pit

Tied to a lurking fear, is there no exit?

Gosh!

Every nerve in this body stretched taut

Is now cold to the answer being sought

Waiting for someone to clean this mess

And make a little space for happiness…

Then one day I decided to press ‘pause’

And deliberately observe each clause

Eeh!

Awful yet alive with moulds as in blight

Some ghosts of those long out of sight

Having cherished them all this while...

I found hard to own an archaic compile

It was time to bid farewell to each kind

And to begin I stepped out of my mind

Sigh!

A deep breathe in to cape each thought

And breathe ’em out, a monstrous lot

Sshhh!

No voice in my head, just empty space

As if I had just finished a gruelling race

No questions, no opinions and no plans

No illusions of any existential command

Unplugged from remnants of the past  

Ready to re-discover the present at last

capriccio !

A chequered olive table cloth, an apple tart with cream
And a mug full of Irish coffee, sneaking from the brim

Rays of new sunlight through a colored window glass
Above few long stemmed roses in a tall bamboo vase,

An oak tree nearby, stretching to reach the window sill
And a path down to the woods beyond the chalet's frill

The sky drew shades of caramel and gold in odd ratios
As a puff of air nudged few leaves dozing on the patio

She lifted the bow to draw across the strings of her violin
And bowed her head, eyes closed, fingers contemplating

Like a misty breeze it stirred every cell of her body
And gushed out through her form in pure rhapsody

In the capriccio were entwined her sense and her soul
Her wish to reach out and seek the world unexplored!!

For that moment she was nothing but the melody itself
With a resolve on the New Year day to just be herself!

Magpie - Part I

It was a Sunday morning. But for me it was not much different from any other day. Seven years year ago I had decided not to be a part of this so called corporate world, leaving my family in a slight quandary. All this while, they had tried their best to give me a direction in life. I was put in a good school, prepared for a top engineering college and had then landed up with decent job. And then the direction changed.

The year I had spent during an MBA course was more like a contemplation camp. Away from my family once again, thinking what and whom to value most, I had acquired enough peradventures about the right way of living a life. The proclivity towards risks has subsided early on. What were left were the memories; some painful recollections of the once vivacious and vibrant dreams. Like a magpie, I had stashed lots of them within me, believing all of them will be true one day.

While most people in the college knew what they wanted next, I simply watched the time go by. It became an unusually favorite pastime; watching the sun set from the hostel’s balcony and hoping for a revelation to strike at some odd afternoon setting the course of my life. The effort to hold on to the dreams had taken its toll. All paths would bring me back to where I started from. Things which made sense one day lost their meaning the very next day. Mere thought of them was repugnant. It became increasingly difficult to believe in something and above all myself. I had chosen to follow a different direction but I didn’t know what it would be.

They say that if you really want to know your passion then look back at your childhood. The thing which excited you most then would be ‘it’. And I knew it all along. The desire surfaced so many times. Each time accompanied with hope and anguish. But I never had the nerve to hold it up against the squall. Each time I turned away from it towards the assigned direction, my faith in self would fade some more.

This went on until a mundane visit to a mall, The Dubai Mall. There, the Ice Rink. And therein, The three performers. What they performed in unison was simply breathtaking. Many people stood by to watch and admire. No acrobats, just simple movements of hand and body stirred by the cadence. It was dance no doubt but that was ancillary, what was primary was the free spirit. And that was what which riveted me to the spot for a long time. I could see in them an open sky; feel an unlimited expanse of emerald green grass, breath a fresh a whiff of extremely pure air … It was so liberating. I was as if staring at my soul. The direction changed that very moment. The signpost of my life now had a destination. My own ice rink and an ice skating academy...

.....contd in part II

In search of fire .....

Seemed to look up at me, questioning, eyes lost in a mire

There’re so many, then why did you choose me, you liar!

I believed your heart your words then so pure

But I can’t trust them to be yours any more

Don’t think you can possess me for you’re left with no desire

You now belong to the crowd who can only look and admire

Hoped that someday you’ll return to me or at least you

Wished for long, that you forget everything to start new

Gosh! can’t believe you’re the same, acting so meek

But now it’s getting late and you’re making me weak

Cry if you feel like, but that won’t get you me, Sire!

The one thing you need, if you care still, is the fire!

.

.

.

For then, no goal remains huge and no aim too high

You’ve won half the battle just when you say aye!!

For those struggling to make something out of it ... the 'I' in the poem is the 'Goal' of the person talking to him and the 'YOU' is the person.

Inspired by : Aishwarya Singh